I have struggled with a lot of things my whole life – mainly not being good enough. When I was younger I was the chubby girl in the class, or the got boobs first, or couldn’t spell well. It was a lot of things in my mind.
As I grew up a lot stuck with me. I wasn’t smart enough, as I barely passed all my classes in High School and College. Not good enough of a friend, as I can never find the right words. I am not the best at making friends, as I am very shy, stutter and have a horrible memory.
I have also struggled for as long as I can remember with my body image.
My whole life I have gone up and down with my weight. My first year of college I refused to gain the freshman fifteen, so I worked or 2+ hours a day. This lasted for most of my college life. Then when I met Justin I slowly started gaining weight, as I worked more and more at a desk most of the day.
But, something clicked this year. Why does it matter to me what others think about how I look? What really matters is how I feel and how important people feel about me. I have been working at loving my body more.
We go swimming more often, not caring about showing my arms & laying out tanning my legs. I bought my first pair of shorts in YEARS! Not to mention my first suit was bought just 2 years ago – but barely wore!
Loving yourself doesn’t come overnight, like everything it comes with some work.
I am not in a rush to be comfortable in my body. I want to make sure I love who I am fully not just comfortable. Get me? It’s OK to take baby steps! Not everyone can go on Social Media in their bikini and confess their insecurities. Take your time getting into that swimsuit, wearing that tank top, or shorts. But, when you do, remind yourself that you are beautiful! That those who matter most love you the way you are!